Friday January 28, 2011...8:45 (sad isn't it)
Why can't I be like normal people? Why can't I wake up with happy thoughts of what the day will bring? Why is my mind consumed with alcohol first thing every morning? Why can't I deliver myself? Why won't God just instantly deliver me? Why won't He take all these urges, desires away? I mean I don't want to drink at all. It took me a while to get to that point and now that I'm there, the voices in my head won't stop! I hate it...let me say that again...I HATE IT!!!!!!!!!!! I struggle with why He has reasons for this but I guess I do need to trust Him. He has a purpose for everything. I just wish I knew what purpose obsessing about alcohol will serve. I'm just glad I have Him on my side or I would be doomed.
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